Never let it be said that Remnants is not a disciplined team of highly skilled cricketers who choose to ply their trade in the relaxed environment of Cambridge mid-week friendlies simply to get away from the grind of the professional circuit.
Tonight, for instance, we began with a fast-reaction fielding drill, everyone a few metres apart in a perfect circle, the ball flicking randomly from player to player almost with a life of its own, like a planchette zooming across a ouija board. This show of hand-eye coordination was something to behold, at least until captain Daniel Mortlock got distracted and copped the ball in the groinal vicinity. Fortunately a protector was in place for just such a mishap -- and it was certainly a better feat of organisation than the previous night when he forgot his shoes and lost his cap. And even that's an improvement on the efforts of on-field enforcer Nick Clarke who, having played last night with his socks and underwear annoyingly damp, had his wife tell him that their dog had relieved itself in his kit bag. One way around this might be for Nick to store his gear with the club kit in the Fitz changing rooms . . . although this too has its perils, given that Dave came in one night to find two teenagers in there looking very guilty -- particular the girl, who was still getting back to her feet at the time. There was at least one triumph on the kit front, though: Stas Shabala, famous for playing through two whole seasons in old black track-suit bottoms, dazzled today in his bright new whites . . .
. . . and was thus awarded a similarly shiny new ball with which to start the match. Stas (1/17) and Bryan Lea (2/19) both bowled their seam-up stuff brilliantly, putting The Chemistry Lab on the back-foot from the outset. After that it was spin all the way -- a bit risky with a very short boundary on one side, but ultimately vindicated by the steady flow of wickets. From one end we had offies from Russell Woolf (1/13) and Remnants debutante Adrian Mellish (2/35); from the other it was all leg-spin as Tom Jordan (1/21) and Jim Higginson (2/10) tried to out-flight each other. And a good thing too, as it was their flight that most troubled the batsmen, and they were a bit unlucky to have just the three wickets between them as a series of top edges and mis-hits fell into the gaps.
More importantly, when the ball did go to a fielder, we held our chances. Nick (twice) and Daniel made up for their ``wardrobe malfunctions'' with some sharp takes at short mid-wicket, but the real highlight was Russell's juggling and, eventually, falling effort at first slip (although the ball would have bounced about ten feet in front of him if 'keeper Andy Owen hadn't tethered him to the correct spot a few yards from the bat). The ground-fielding wasn't quite so good, with a bit too much footwork and bit too little thought before the throw -- several times mad screams for the ball to go to one end were met with the ball being hurled to the other (or just in the general direction of the pitch) and, like last night, we completely fluffed a run out chance where both batsmen were hopelessly marooned at one end of the pitch.
Still, all this getting worked up about missed run outs was put into perspective when Matthew Brooker, Chemistry's captain and wicket-keeper, top-edged a sweep into his face and split open his eye-brow. After collecting himself -- and most of the blood -- he was taken off to Addenbrooke's for precautionary X-rays while the rest of us finished off the final over of the innings in contemplative slow-motion. Thankfully Matthew got the all-clear but, given that this can happen from even the slowest bowling, it does make you think that we must all be very brave for playing such a hard sport and risking our good looks in the process.
The innings break gave everyone the chance to focus on the game again, and the end result of our time in the field was that the match was evenly poised. We needed 117 to win off 120 balls, but with dew already on the ground and the Sun seemingly setting earlier than it did last night it wasn't going to be an easy chase.
Chemistry's opening bowlers proved themselves a handful, mixing pace and bounce, and after 6 (eight-ball) overs we were 30/3 with only Mike Sneyd (19, with 2 fours) having seriously troubled the scorers. Paul Jordan (14, with 2 fours as well) played some elegant shots to up the scoring rate (despite his best-timed drives going straight to fielders), but when he departed we were 51/4 after 8 overs and, needing 67 off 56 balls, the match seemed to be slipping away.
And it probably would have but for the fact that Chemistry were a bowler or two short, and the next few overs contained what, for them, must have been a maddeningly high number of wides and long-hops. The former contribued an even dozen to our total and the latter were fodder for the favoured pull shots of Daniel Mortlock (44*, with 6 fours) and Andy Owen (17*, with 2 fours). A match that had been in the balance (at best) a few overs earlier was thus won in a canter; and, for the first time since 2001, Remnants came away from the first week of the season ``two for two''.
We were also set to double-up on last night's monster drinking session, with the second Champions' League semi-final being played -- except this time it was only being shown on bastard Sky Sports. Probably just as well for fans of English football, but it has at least set up a repeat of the epic 2005 final that saw Liverpool claw their way back to beat AC Milan from 3-0 down. And that night two years ago also saw Dave's bar drunk dry after a Remnants-Girton game, so there might be an opportunity for something similarly ambitious after our match against Selwyn on May 23 . . .